RIP CANDY

Sorry Brenton I done broke your bike!


B lent me this kick ass ride while I was putting my Gazetta together. I thrashed it, maybe a little too hard... right in to a wall on the Main Yarra Trail. FFFFUUUUUU slimy wooden slats on the path and bitches on the wrong side.


This is why we can't have nice things :(

FUCKING KILLED. Right on the hip.

My sister thinks that I should start a blog just featuring my injuries. There would be so many posts featuring that elbow: I don't even have any skin there anymore, I just keep on ripping off the scar tissue. 

Such a lady. 

xx 

WINTER 11 ACCESSORIES: DOS AND DON'TS

Location: Church Street, Richmond

DO

Add a colour-pop. Spokey Dokes & Frame, well matched.

Location: Prahran Market

DO

Rock a Milk crate in tonal proportions. A solid investment piece.

Like a Chanel 2.55..... It will never go out of style.

Location: Como, South Yarra

DO

Add some flair to the simplest of rides.

Location: Swan Street, Richmond

DON'T

This helmet is fuckin POV.

It's right up there with the polystyrene ESKY.

TREND FORECAST

Location: Fitness First, Richmond

Accessory Report.

It may not be for everyone. But keep your eyes peeled for creative prehistoric ornaments.

Taking its cue from Happy Meal toys and coming to a bike near you.

MELB CENT TOP TUBE FLAIR

Bike: Top Tube Flair
Location: Asian Central
Owner: TBC!!! Email us if this is you

Spotted this sweet ride on our shopping trip into the cbd for new shades. 

Top tube pad looks cool... but what's the purpose? Apart from looking cool?

So your thigh is comfy when resting at lights because you can't track stand like me? 

To protect your top tube from scratches when you chain it up?

Or purely for aesthetics?

I'm intrigued

xx

THRASHER BIKE

Bike: Thrasher ILL Bike
Location: Vogue Plaza, South Yaz
Owner: Jake


This is the bike that Thrasher Boy would ride if he didn't drive to General Pants every day.
What struck me is the amazing rims and super fat tires, put that in your pipe and smoke it tram tracks!

Noice.

This is actually the first time that I have been busted snapping a bike by the owner. I was kneeling on the pavement to get the above shot and I just saw two feet in my peripheral. How embarrasment!


Wanted to run away, but...





You can't keep running awaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyy


xx

THE GREEN MACHINE

Bike: The Green Machine

Location: Melbourne

Owner: Brenton Clarke

Big thanks to Brenton for sending through pics of his gorgeous steed. I popped in to his shop with my poodle Ziggy in tow for a visit. The colourway reminds me of the incredible hulk and this bike that I learnt how to ride fixed on. 

This is what a colab of Brenton's bike x Ziggy would look like:

Ha ha as if you would ever do that to your pooch! Poor dawg :(

Brenton has now retired this bike and is using the wheels on his new ride, which I LOVE, so much it's crim.

The Green Machine is just taking 5, hanging out in the garage where all good bikes go to die... RIP little friend: 

xx

GIANT BMX

Bike: Giant BMX
Location: Elgin St, Carlton
Owner: TBC, email us if this is YOU!

Um... sorry to break it to you giant BMX: You ain't that giant. Actually you are pretty small.

This bike is cool, but it has a bad case of small man syndrome.

Like how Tom Cruise apparently never allowed 'Our' Nicole to wear high heels, or those rockabilly type of short dudes that wear those horrendous shoes with the lifts in them.

My lord how I hate those ugly, ugly shoes.

Get ready for your close up:


xx

WHY THANK-YOU WATTO

Bike: Black and Gold, Black and Gold, Black and Goooooooooooooooooooooold
Location: Malvern Rd, South Yaz
Owner: TBC. Email us if this is YOU!

Such a sexy specimen. Many thanks to our reporter on the run Watto who took this pic.



AWESOME NOW I WILL HAVE THIS IN MY HEAD FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK.

xx

GEELONG V COLLINGWOOD

We went to the football last Saturday night to see the Cats v the Pies.

Our team lost, but the game was entertaining none the less.

Lowlight = Only mid strength beer in plastic cups. It was like Splendour all over again.

Midlight = Laughing at the Collingwood Boags. SRSLY. Where do these people come from?!!

Highlight = Spotting This Bike

Bike: Some Kind of Machine from THE FUTURE

Owner: Probably a Cats Supporter (TBC, email us if this is you)

Location: MCG

This bike looks like is straight out of that show "Beyond 2000"

Mental Note: Lookup "Beyond 2000" on YouTube later

CHECK OUT THE BUILT IN LIGHT. LIKE WHOA!

The Brooks seat always talks to me.

This one's saying: "I may be a psycho bike from the future, but I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany"

Hey lady! It might be a night game but that doesn't mean you have to come in your jim jams.
She has the matching Collingwood jammies and slippers. WOW.
If I was that kid I would be like "Muuuuummmmm noooooooooooooo!" and then get lost accidentally on purpose.

AS you can tell, I have dedicated this post to all you Collingwood bogans out there.
I am so generous with my time, I have even made you a Venn Diagram.

Enjoy:


xx

A MYTHICAL ENCOUNTER

So there I was, walking down by the old fire station in Perth just minding my own biz, when I noticed this odd looking creature coming towards me...

White all over with a coloured protrusion coming out of its head...

"Damn !" I thought, "It must be a unicorn !”

With one hand clasped firmly around a "large winter dream milky bubble tea w/ sago" I stood transfixed as the beast continued its approach.

Smooth and silky, it wasn't until I could feel the heat emancipating from its white core that the full predicament of my situation hit me. Here I was, witnessing a once in a lifetime opportunity - and where the shit was my camera ?!?

Sensing my distress, the rider of this noble steed chose that exact moment to dismount right there in front of me under the pretext of making a call...

As if to say "everybody gets one" he stood eerily still as I reached into my back pocket and grasped my ol trusty camera / phone !

Then, with barely a neigh (or perhaps a sudden change of mind?), he was back on and off again leaving me scantily a moment to cry "it's for yourbikeisrad dot com forwardslash blogspot tumblr!"

Since the, I have often wonder about that day and perhaps, maybe just maybe, if I'm lucky I'll get to see it again one day :)

Big thanks to Enrico Iglesias our eyes in Perth for this submission

xx

IF I GAVE YOU DIAMONDS & PEARLS.....

Bike: The artist formally known as Ride
Location: Port Melbs
Owner: Daniel

Wowzer. I would be a happy boy or a girl...if i owned this ride.
It belongs to our good friend Dan. Details below;

Original 60/70s lugged frame resprayed mother of pearl
Original track drop bars – white cork gripped
700C Stars fixed single gear wheels with Vittoria tyre
Custom chromed lugged track forks straight
Lasco crank set with red chain-ring
San Marco Rolls saddle
Wellgo track pedals with toes clip and double strap

It's about as cool as Prince was before Love Symbol.
23 positions in a one night stand x

KRINK

Bike: Krink Fixx
Location: RMIT
Owner: TBC. Email us if this is you!

Having just started a new job on the "other side" of the city, I have been going out on little missions on my lunch break on the search for Rad Bikes. There are shitloads of bikes parked around RMIT on Swanston, you know because students are pov and they can't afford the whole $2.30 for a Metcard so they ride. When I was in uni I found a yearly Metcard at (haha) Seven nightclub so I was totally SET for the year. I then blew the dough I saved on goon. Awesome.

For those who don't know, KRINK (KR's ink) make totally bauce markers for, well, leaving your mark on shit. Like Poscas but way more drippy.

Check them out here

Don't Come Gallery had a Krink show last year. I miss you Don't Come. Why'd you have to shut down assholes?

xx

OMG BMX

WTF is this? I need a napkin for my chair!

xx

SMURF STYLE

Bike: Shmick Rapallo Fixed Gear

Location: Cookie, Swanston St Melbourne

Owner: TBC. Email us if this is YOU!

This bike looks like if Gargamel put an evil curse on one of the little smurfs that made him a lot bigger and bike shaped.

If I had this sweet ride I would probs match it with this T-Shirt by my favourite designers, PAM:

Thanks to my sweet soon to be sister in law, REN! You rule!

xx

COMO (NH)

Bike: Specialized Langster 09

Location: Como, Toorak Rd South Yarra

Owner: TBC. Email us if this is you!

I spotted this sleek, shiny delight while leaving work on Thursday afternoon.

The owner of this bike must have just bought this, or is anally clean.

Web: http://www.freedommachine.com.au/item.asp?ID=990

xx

THE GARY COLEMAN

Bike: 20" Black Beauty

Location: Queen Victoria Market, Melbourne

Owner: TBC: Email us if this is YOU!

This bike is nice. It is short, black and a lil' stumpy.

If this bike were a tv character it would totally be Arnold in Diff'rent Strokes.

Whatcha talkin bout Willis?

Sometimes I wish that I had a catchphrase.

The X-factor True Structure Mags? Holy Moley!

The thing that first caught my eye about this little beauty was the those Three Spoke Mags. They are tough.

Gary Coleman is not tough. After his success as a child actor he sued his parents and former manager over his $3.8 million trust fund.
He won a almost $1.3 mil in 93 then filed for bankrupcy 6 years later... Way to Go Gary!

xx

WHITE HOT STALKER

Bike: Nice Fixie
Location: Alexandra Av/Church Street
Owner: Dude.

I swear it was pure coincidence that I should be trailing this dude En Route to the office this morning...

Don't get me wrong. I Love COLOUR. But nothing screams fresh, than the clean aesthetic of white-on-white. Minimalistic HOT.

I'd ride this in a heartbeat.